College Football Stories

Okay, hear me out: conference expansion has gotten ridiculous. Oregon in the B1G? Missouri in the SEC? Cal and Stanford–two teams that can feel the winds coming off the Pacific Ocean–in the Atlantic Coast Conference?! Madness! I miss the real Pac-12 after dark and I long for the days of the Big East being more than just a basketball conference.

Unfortunately, we are never going back to the way it was. But this is my blog and my college football universe, so we are going to set things right. We are going back to conferences that have regional ties, as it should always be. The first league we will create is full of teams from the great state of Texas. Only teams from Texas. There’s like a million of them.

Several of these teams are current or former rivals and/or conference mates, so there is plenty of familiarity among the players, coaches, and fans. Whether or not the winner competes in a national playoff is irrelevant. They’re from Texas and they’re already better than you. In fact, as of November 26th, 2025, there are three teams from Texas in a position to make the twelve team College Football Playoff, and a fourth team on the outside looking in.

Author’s note: when I started writing this story, I had originally named this league the Lone Star Conference. I was completely unaware that there was an official, real-life Lone Star Conference. The LSC was founded in 1931 after five schools withdrew from the Texas Intercollegiate Athletic Association. The LSC is a Division II conference made up of 18 schools. Fourteen of those schools are from Texas, and two each hail from Oklahoma and New Mexico. The LSC is a springboard to big time college football, as all five founding members are now Division I. Three of those five schools are at the FBS level.

Texas

Let’s start with some obvious choices for good fits within our new league. Our first pick, shockingly, is the University of Texas at Austin. The Longhorns will represent the league well. Much like the residents of the state, they can’t go more than five seconds without mentioning where they’re from and how much money they have. Unfortunately, the ability to buy land and Lamborghini’s does not buy you SEC championships. They have better luck within their own state than when they are playing teams from Florida or Georgia.

All-time win/loss record: 969–397–33 (.704)

Conference titles: TIAA (2); Southwest Conference (27); Big 12 (4)

National championships claimed: 1963, 1969, 1970, 2005

Texas A&M

At pick number two, we will draft the nation’s top ranked occult, the Texas A&M Aggies. The Fightin’ Texas Ags hate the Longhorns almost as much as they love long haired collies. The Aggies are an odd bunch, with their all-male cheerleaders and yelling in the dark. One can only assume that the Midnight Yell is a weekly College Station HOA meeting where residents can air their grievances without repercussions.

All-time win/loss record: 796–509–48 (.606)

Conference titles: SWC (17); Big 12 (1)

National championships claimed: 1919, 1927, 1939

Texas Tech

Coming in at the third spot are the Texas Tech Red Raiders. Lubbock, like most of West Texas, is basically in New Mexico, but we’ll allow it. Unlike their counterparts in Aggieland, Tech has traditions that are actually cool. There is the Masked Rider, Will Rogers, Guns Up, and the Tortilla Toss (RIP). The Tortilla Toss will not only be legal, but it will be highly encouraged once we activate this league. Texas Tech once employed legendary head coach Mike Leach, and even though they wrongfully terminated the Pirate, they still get a lot of credit for hiring him. Michael Crabtree’s touchdown catch against Texas in 2008 was peak BCS-era football.

All-time win/loss record: 606–486–32 (.553)

Conference titles: Border (9); SWC (2)

National championships claimed: 0

Houston

The fourth pick in this Texas-sized draft are the Houston Cougars. The Coogs have a former Heisman Trophy winner in Andre Ware and are in a very talent-rich area of Texas. They also have closer proximity to water than most other schools in the state. The “space” center is also nearby, and once those “astronauts” find oil on the “moon”, the NIL budget for the Cougars will be ridiculous. Head coach Willie Fritz is already making some serious moves on the trail, with a commitment from the number one high school quarterback in the country for 2026.

All-time win/loss record: 484–404–15 (.544)

Conference titles: MVC (4); SWC (4); C-USA (2); AAC (1)

National championships claimed: 0

TCU

For the fifth pick, we will go to Fort Worth. The Texas Christian University Horned Frogs have played for a national championship much more recently than any other team in Texas, but don’t ask them what happened in that game. The Horned Frogs have one of the weirdest and coolest cheers in college football: “Riff, Ram, Bah, Zoo! Lickety, Lickety, Zoo Zoo! Who, Wah, Wah, Who! Give ’em Hell, TCU!” We don’t really know what it means. Head coach Sonny Dykes left his position across town at SMU to take the TCU job, making that rivalry even more heated. Long live the Hypnotoad.

All-time win/loss record: 655–549–57 (.542)

Conference titles: TIAA (1); SWC (9); Western Athletic Conference (2); C-USA (1); Mountain West (4); Big 12 (1)

National championships claimed: 1935, 1938

SMU

Coming in at sixth are the Southern Methodist University Mustangs. SMU battles for the Iron Skillet every year with their Dallas-Ft. Worth counterpart TCU. The Mustangs have a tremendous history in the sport, with legendary players like Doak Walker and Eric Dickerson. Other notable SMU alumni include former First Lady Laura Bush and famed Dunder Mifflin accountant Kevin Malone. They are not currently making any money in the ACC, so they will be an easy draw to our league.

All-time win/loss record: 552–567–54 (.494)

Conference titles: SWC (11); AAC (1)

National championships claimed: 1935, 1981, 1982

Baylor

Lucky number seven belongs to the Baylor Bears. Robert Griffin III captured the hearts of college football fans in 2011. RG3 put up ridiculous numbers en route to winning the Heisman Trophy and landing on the cover of NCAA ’13. Chip and Joanna Gaines can keep the money flowing for any program needs. If the coaching staff needs a fixer-upper or two, I’m sure Mike Singletary can make some recommendations. Don’t call Art Briles, though.

All-time win/loss record: 632–608–44 (.509)

Conference titles: SWC (7); Big 12 (3)

National championships claimed: 0

North Texas

Number eight in our draft goes to the North Texas Mean Green. The boys from Denton are scoring all kinds of points these days in the American Conference. They are also taking off their shirt, twisting it around their hand, and spinning it like a helicopter. North Texas is the former stomping grounds of the Texas Rattlesnake, Stone Cold Steve Austin, who played linebacker and defensive end for the Mean Green in the late 1980’s.

All-time win/loss record: 546–535–33 (.505)

Conference titles: TIAA (1); LSC (8); Gulf Coast Conference (5); Missouri Valley Conference (5); Southland Conference (2); SBC (4)

National championships claimed: 0

UTSA

The ninth team in our league is also the youngest team in Texas. The University of Texas at San Antonio Roadrunners have only had a football program since 2011. They spent their first season as an FCS Independent before joining the WAC in year 2. From 2013-2022, the Roadrunners were in Conference USA, winning the league in 2021 and 2022. This two-year run was the most successful in school history, with UTSA going 23-5 with two bowl game appearances. Head coach Jeff Traylor is a Texas football lifer, playing at Stephen F. Austin as a walk-on tight end. He spent the next 25 years at the high school level, most notably in his hometown of Gilmer, Texas. Traylor won three state titles and was named Texas High School Coach of the Year four times. Playing football in the Alamodome is one of the most Texas things ever. I’d check to see if Frank Harris has any eligibility left. Meep meep.

All-time win/loss record: 87–76–0 (.534)

Conference titles: C-USA (2)

National championships claimed: 0

Texas State

At the tenth spot, we have the Texas State Bobcats, currently the state’s only Sun Belt representative. San Marcos is the home of the Bobcats, situated about halfway between Austin and San Antonio on I-35. The Bobcats were a longtime member of the Lone Star Conference while at the Division II level. They were planning a move to the Pac-12 in 2026 before we talked them into joining our league instead. Texas State won back-to-back Division II national championships in 1981 and 1982, becoming yet another team from the state with more recent national titles than Texas A&M.

All-time win/loss record: 543–504–25 (.518)

Conference titles: Texas Normal (1); Texas Teachers College (1); TIAA (1); LSC (9); Southland (2)

National championships claimed: (Division II) 1981, 1982

UTEP

The number eleven team is the University of Texas at El Paso. I’m fairly certain that the school is actually in Mexico. The Miners play their home games in the Sun Bowl. They also have the second most appearances (8) in the Sun Bowl next to Texas Tech (9). Their first football season was in 1914, when the school was known as the State College of Mines and Metallurgy. UTEP fans throw up the “Miner Pickaxe” hand symbol, which is categorically cooler than anything Texas or Texas A&M do.

All-time win/loss record: 416–644–28 (.395)

Conference titles: Border (1); WAC (1)

National championships claimed: 0

Sam Houston State

The number twelve spot belongs to UTEP’s C-USA counterpart, the Sam Houston State Bearkats. Located in Huntsville, Texas–not Houston–the orange and white-clad Bearkats–not Bearcats–were an FCS power many years before joining the FBS level in 2023. The Bearkats won the FCS National Championship in 2020-21, taking down South Dakota State. Sam Houston also made appearances in the FCS title game in 2011 and 2012 under current Houston head coach Willie Fritz.

All-time win/loss record: 574–497–36 (.535)

Conference titles: TIAA (1); LSC (4); GSC (2); Southland (7); WAC (1)

National championships claimed: (NAIA) 1964; (FCS) 2020

Rice

Lucky number 13 goes to a school bearing the name of the food that Texas is best known for. That’s right, the final FBS spot in the Texas League goes to Rice! Located in Houston, the Owls were a Southwest Conference member from 1915 to 1995, winning eight conference championships. Since the SWC disbanded in 1996, Rice has bounced around from the Western Athletic Conference to Conference USA to the American Athletic Conference. Well, I say no more! Come on home, Owls, you belong here. Rice has natural in-state rivalries dating back to the SWC days, including Baylor and Texas. The Owls have a cross-town rivalry with the Houston Cougars, known as the Bayou Bucket Classic, as well a rivalry with SMU, called the Battle for the Mayor’s Cup.

All-time win/loss record: 497–657–32 (.433)

Conference titles: SWC (7); C-USA (1)

National championships claimed: 0

Promotion & Relegation

Okay, that was a Texas-sized list of Texas teams in the ultimate Texas conference. Let’s set up the league’s schedule and championship format. Since there are 13 FBS teams, thus leaving us an uneven division split, we will have to promote an FCS team to the big boy table. We will promote the best FCS team from the state of Texas based on the most recent year’s results.

To save us some time, we will let FCS playoff selections and rankings decide this for us. Currently, in November of 2025, the highest ranked Texas team in FCS is Tarleton State at No. 5. The Texans (yes, that’s right) are currently 11-1. Assuming they finish as the highest ranked team from the state to end the year, they will be promoted to the 14th team in our league to start off the next season.

Now, here is where it gets interesting: we will promote and relegate one team from the Texas League each season. If Tarleton State were to finish dead last in league play, then they would go back to the FCS level and the highest-ranked FCS team would be promoted to fill their spot. However, if one of the current FBS teams finished last, Tarleton would stay and the aforementioned FBS school would be relegated to FCS. It pays to be a winner, or at least to not finish in dead last.

Scheduling

There are many natural rivalries already among these schools, which will make scheduling a bit easier. The divisions will be set up to give us as many of those traditional match-ups as possible, while also respecting the balance necessary to create an exciting and competitive league. Division A (Yee) and Division B (Haw) will each have seven teams, they will all play eight total conference games each year. The winners of each division will play in the conference championship game. The two teams at the bottom of the league (regardless of division), will also play at the Cotton Bowl to see who gets relegated and who survives another season.

Division A (Yee):

1. Texas Longhorns
2. Texas Tech Red Raiders
3. SMU Mustangs
4. TCU Horned Frogs
5. Texas State Bobcats
6. Sam Houston State Bearkats
7. UTEP Miners

Division B (Haw):

1. Texas A&M Aggies
2. Houston Cougars
3. Baylor Bears
4. North Texas Mean Green
5. UTSA Roadrunners
6. Tarleton State Texans
7. Rice Owls

Protected (cross-division) rivalries: Texas v. Texas A&M, TCU v. Baylor, Houston v. Texas Tech, UTEP v. UTSA, SMU v. North Texas, Sam Houston v. Rice, Tarleton State v. Texas State